A Dawn I Need To Bear
by ladyasile
Summary: The gift of life is precious, and rare in some events. How far is one willing to go to protect a life, even if it puts others at risk of ending their own? Yaoi.
1. Chapter 1

**A Dawn I Need To Bear**

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A/N: Special thanks to my beta Brokenshardsofmyheart99!

Disclaimer: I do not own Get Backers.

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As he sat in front of the single man that would help him, Kazuki fidgeted with his wedding ring. The engraved letters on the inside of the ring kept him collected as he tried to open his mouth once again to tell the man what had happened that made him seek him out. With a gulp, Kazuki looked up. The man in front of him wore casual clothing; a black t-shirt and skin-tight, faded blue jeans. There were no shoes on the man's feet, just white socks. And unlike him, his single hope was dry, smelled of cologne, and did not have any mud or dried blood on him.

The cold air in the room made him tremble, making him think that he looked like an injured newborn pup. Comparing himself to a puppy made him remember the sole reason for all of the chaos in his life as of recent. Kazuki bit his lips until blood began to ooze out and run down his chin. This seemed to have made the man in the casual clothes uneasy, but he still got up and handed him a tissue to clean the blood up. Having no other option, Kazuki took the tissue, picked up the blood with it, and furrowed it with his hand.

Another lighting strike made hem both jump up and gasp. The apartment was too quiet, too dark, too alone. It was a haven, but for how long depended not on himself. "Toshiki," he mumbled, feeling tears on the corners of his eyes. "You've agreed to help me, but you don't understand my situation. Nor do you fathom the perilous road that might await you." The blonde man did not utter anything nor did he move at what he had said "Are you certain that you have not made a mistake in taking me in?" Kazuki asked, hoping that Toshiki would not turn him away, even if it was selfish of him to do so.

The blonde stood up and walked to a seat closer to him. "Kazuki, I vowed to protect you. I'm willing to go through with that promise, but please let me in." A roar from the sky interrupted Toshiki before he could continue with what he was about to say. "Kazuki, who are you running away from?" As simple as the question seemed, not even Kazuki himself knew. Toshiki remained wary of their distance by not coming closer to him. It made sense to Kazuki, though. His friend seemed like the type to comfort someone by trying to make them comfortable.

With a quivery breath, Kazuki looked up into Toshiki's eyes. Shaking his head, he answered the question. "Toshiki, I don't even know that." The answer seemed to trouble the blonde man since his eyes widened and his mouth closed and opened several times with no words coming out. "They want something… Or rather someone." Kazuki whispered as he looked around the room. Every time this particular topic came up, it made him inspect his surroundings. Within his mind, he knew that it was from reminding himself that he was being hunted down, like an rare species of animal.

Rendered speechless for that brief moment, Toshiki walked to him and held him in his arms. Being caught in his protector's arms, Kazuki began to let the tears he had held run down. Licking his lips, he tasted the salt in the tears along with come of the coppery taste of the drying blood. They held each other a bit longer before releasing one another. The close proximity of their faces made Kazuki feel closer to the man, now more than ever. "Who do they want, Kazuki?" The question he had been avoiding had come up, and there were no lies he could tell the man that had agreed to help him.

Nodding to himself, Kazuki decided to tell the truth. It would have been impossible to lie to someone after they had held you and looked into your eyes, at least for him it was. Kazuki brought himself to full height and began to remove his tattered coat. Water had been dripping from it and there had been mud, blood, and even shards of glass on it, but he had refused to take it off for two main reasons. As he was about to open the coat, he turned away from Toshiki.

"Toshiki…" he whispered as he tossed the coat to chair he had been using. It was when he turned around to face the blonde man that he saw the look of shock in his eyes.


	2. Chapter 2

**A Dawn I Need To Bear**

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A/N: Special thanks to Brokenshardsofmyheart99, who would've checked this if there had been time. Thank you for the reviews! (Sorry for the short chapter.)

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Bowing his head, Kazuki picked up the tattered and filthy coat. Before putting it around himself, he shook it. "That's why I'm being hunted down. Toshiki, now you know why I need your aid. If you wish to back down, I understand. It is far too much to ask of anyone, particularly you."

"No," Toshiki said, shaking his head. "Juubei and I vowed we would protect you. He certainly did keep his promise. That's why I don't intend on letting you down." When he reached him, Toshiki embraced him. "What happened to Juubei, Kazuki?" he asked, patting his head and stroking his hair.

Burrowing his head on the man's chest, Kazuki answered, "I don't know." After taking in a shuddery breath, he explained. "We were together up until two days ago. All of this began to happened months ago, Toshiki, but neither Juubei or I realized it until last week."

Toshiki released him. "Kazuki," he said, tilting his head so they saw each other's eyes. "You'll need to explain everything to me. So far, little of this makes sense to me. Although, I don't think you know much either, huh?"

"You're right," Kazuki answered, nodding. "Perhaps things will become clear later. I want to find Juubei, I need him, Toshiki. You're my only hope in finding him and in trying to make sense of this, too." Closing his eyes, he rested his head on Toshiki's chest. "I'm tired, though. There hasn't been enough time to rest."

Stroking his hair, Toshiki brought him closer to his body. He lifted him up and began to walk. "You can sleep here. We'll have to move soon, won't we? For now, just rest. You need it, Kazuki." Removing the clutter from his bed, he moved Kazuki into a sitting position on the bed. "Make yourself comfortable," he said as he took off the tattered coat from Kazuki's body.

"It's your bed. You should sleep on it, Toshiki," Kazuki whispered, his eyes closed.

Chuckling, Toshiki responded. "I will, but after you go to sleep. Let me check some things first, then I'll come back and sleep next to you."

With his eyes blurry from sleep, Kazuki saw Toshiki walk to his closet. When he opened it, he took out two suitcases. Soon after, he began filling them up with several articles of clothing, emergency supplies and anything else someone would need on a trip. It was evident that the blonde was packing up for both of them.

By this time tomorrow, or perhaps earlier, they would be gone.

Clutching the blanket with his hand, Kazuki closed his eyes. "Toshiki, when this is over, I will pay you back for this," he muttered, hoping the man understood him.

It appeared he had, for he responded with a soft laugh. "This is my job, Kazuki, both as your bodyguard and as your friend. Why pay me back for this? Besides, it'll be enough when you're safe."

Smiling to himself, Kazuki's grasp on the blanket loosened. He felt his own breath become softer, a lullaby for him. "Good night, Toshiki," he muttered, drifting off to sleep.

Sometime during his sleep, he had woken up. Although he wasn't certain, it felt as if he were in car. It was on the road, driving in the dark. Unable to stay awake, he fell asleep once more.


	3. Chapter 3

Warnings: M/M relationships, M-preg, AU, possibility of OOC, and awful writing.

Disclaimer: I do not own Get Backers.

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**A Dawn I Need To Bear**

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Most of the day was silent, with the exception of the car's engine and the cars that joined them on the road. Toshiki had not said a word to him, nor had he, after the previous night's events. Of course, he had spent most of the day sleeping. That was a stark contrast from before coming to Toshiki for help. Nightmares still plagued him, but it was nothing he could not handle.

Deciding to keep his eyes open and avoid sleeping, he removed the thin sheet that he assumed Toshiki placed on him to keep him warm. The urge to yawn was too great for him to avoid, so he let it out, startling his driver. The car swerved a bit before Toshiki realized the origin of the yawn. Rubbing his eyes, Kazuki sat up on the backseat.

"Did you sleep well?" asked Toshiki, keeping his eyes on the road. From Kazuki's sitting position, he could see the blonde man's hands on the steering wheel. They gripped it tightly, so much that his fingers were turning pale. It was obvious that he had spent too much time driving.

Looking around the car, Kazuki nodded. The car was small, like the type any normal person would own. There was not much room, but it was just right for two people who were not safe in most places. "I did, Toshiki, thank you for asking," he answered. There several questions that he wished to voice out, but his mind could not settle on just one. "Did you?"

"I wasn't tired," he answered without hesitation. Kazuki knew what he meant. He was tired, but he could not rest, or rather, he did not allow himself to do so. Juubei had said the same thing many times.

A voice within him wanted to call Toshiki a liar and make him rest. Rather than do so, he muted it. If he could not get Juubei to do it, Toshiki would not either. Many were like that, more in particular men. When their mind was set on something, there was no resting, no peaceful moment, no worries for their selves. They put on themselves that curse.

From the windows, Kazuki saw few cars pass by. "Where are we? Where are we going?" he asked, eyes still peering at the view beyond the windows. Trees and occasional patches of grass repeated themselves.

Before answering, the blonde man cleared his throat. "I think the farther we get from the cities, the better we will be. Do you remember Ban?" When Kazuki did not answer, he chuckled. "He's Ginji's best friend. If you do not remember him, he is the man who used to be my roommate back when we first met. Anyway, Ban is his boyfriend, unless they broke up again… The point is that he has a place out here. We're close now, Kazuki," he explained.

Faintly he began to remember the men his friend had mentioned. Ginji and Ban at times acted like polar opposites, but their hearts were always in the right place. At least they were until it came to money matters for Ban. Something told Kazuki that money was the main disagreement in their relationship.

"I hope we don't inconvenience them," he muttered.

The car diverted from the main road to a dirt one. "Actually, they're not going to be there," confessed Toshiki while he maneuvered the car around the winding path. "It made more sense to go there without telling anyone. The less people know the better."

Clutching his stomach, Kazuki groaned. "Please, Toshiki, pull over!" he begged as his hand clutched the handle.

After applying the brakes and turning off the car, Toshiki opened the door for him. Kazuki rushed out of the car and dropped to his knees. Opening his mouth, he breathed as if he was losing the ability to do so. A moment's peace passed him by before he vomited. The vile aftertaste remained in his mouth, making him spit out.

For a short second he wondered where Toshiki was. A hand gripped his shoulder while the other pulled back his long hair. Wiping away the saliva around his lips, he steadied himself. "Thank you," he said softly.

"Have some water. It'll help you with the taste," Toshiki replied as he led him back to the car. Once there, he opened the front passenger's door for him. "I'll get the water from the back while you make yourself comfortable."

Taking his friend's advice, he sat on the seat and swung his legs over until they rested inside the car. In that short time, Toshiki had already gathered a water bottle for him. He handed it over to Kazuki, the cap already loosened. He brought the bottle to his lips, drank, and then spat it out. It took three repeats of the cycle until he could no longer taste the vomit. By the fourth, he was ready to relish the freshness of the water. Thinking about it, Kazuki realized he had not had a beverage that he was able to enjoy in the longest time. If he had known before, he knew he would have viewed his experiences differently, no matter how mundane.

Toshiki exhaled loudly, which brought Kazuki back from his thoughts. "I'll start up the car again, if that's okay with you. Do you need to rest some more, Kazuki? Be honest with me."

"Already this has been the greatest rest I've gotten. No, Toshiki, I am fine. Start the car," he replied, hoping his face would not betray his words. Getting out of the car was a treat for his body; it made the ride tolerable. Being inside it was like a punishment, but he could handle the ride as long as he could get off later.

After studying Kazuki for a brief moment, the blonde man obeyed Kazuki's orders and closed the door. A second later, they were driving past the repeated scenery once again. Kazuki's hair lifted away from his face, the wind increasing every minute. The clouds moved fast, bringing with them the rain.

Forty-five minutes later the scenery had changed. Kazuki's brown eyes widened at what was to be their hideout shortly. It was a large untraditional house, made in the image of the western world. Kazuki had only seen such mansions in magazines. Merely looking at it gave him chills, not out of fright, but out of imagining how they would explain themselves to Ban.

Toshiki was already out of the car and making himself busy with getting out the luggage he had brought. Deciding it was time he helped, too, Kazuki opened his door and stepped out. When he was next to his friend, he tried pulling out a large bag out of the trunk. Just as he was about to pull it out fully, Toshiki grabbed it from him with ease. Kazuki was impressed with the man's strength, more so since he had struggled with it.

Much to his surprise, Toshiki placed the bag back into the trunk. "It's best we not take everything in with us, incase we need to leave in a hurry. These two bags should be enough. Before you try, Kazuki, you do not need to help me with the bags. I can carry them."

"I'll close the trunk," said Kazuki with a nod. It should have bothered him, but it made little impact. Juubei was always chivalrous, like Toshiki. The two men always treated him as if he were a woman, except when it involved certain matters.

They stood in front of the entrance when Kazuki realized that the blonde man probably did not have a key. Turning to him, he found Toshiki digging through one of the bags. Apparently, they did have key. It took him a minute to find the key and open the door.

A burst of cool air hit them as they entered. "Is Ban rich?" he asked bluntly. Brown eyes surveyed the house and its contents. All of it looked valuable and untouchable.

Tossing the bags inside, Toshiki grunted. "He does well, but he's not that rich. This is perhaps the most expensive thing he owns. Ginji told me Ban bought this place for him, like a gift for their engagement. Personally I think Ban wanted it for himself, but who am I to argue against him?"

"Especially since we're using this palace without his permission," Kazuki added.

"As long as we don't destroy anything, he'll let us get away with it. Actually, it would be better if he never knew." Toshiki's voice was rich with amusement, probably due to his thoughts. "Let's go find a guest room. Hopefully we won't get lost along the way."

After picking up the bags again, Toshiki began to lead the way upstairs. As they walked, Kazuki took notice of the fine wood floors, the paintings, and the neatness of it all. Although he would not tell Toshiki, he wished they had stayed in a place less fancy. That way each step he took would not be like leaving a mud stain.

After opening and closing a few doors, Toshiki found a room that looked remotely like a guest room and not the main room. "Hey, we have electricity," Toshiki said to him. "We can enjoy ourselves a little here. This place is difficult to find, so we will not have worry about much. Why don't you rest while I'll get us something to eat?"

"Do you know if storms hit hard here?"

Toshiki frowned. "No, I don't. I guess I should not cook anything. Judging from the clouds, it is going to be a big one. Maybe it'll pass by faster than I think."

The blonde man walked out of the room and headed downstairs. Kazuki could hear his footfalls going down the stairs. As he walked to the bed, he kept his gaze fixed on the sky through the window. Lightning was striking, but no rain fell yet.

Passing a hand over the slight bump on his body, he hesitated before touching it. No sign of life responded to his touch. So far, it had not grown as much as he had expected it to. With the proper clothes, he could cover it up and not look so different, so abnormal. Despite that, it did not make a difference to him. The life growing inside of him was the cause for all of the misery in his life. It was responsible for separating him from Juubei. Now it would probably be at fault for Toshiki's fate.

"Am I interrupting?" asked Toshiki as he stood in the doorway, looking at him. A smile tugged at the corners of his mouth. He looked as happy as Juubei had been at first. Knowing the chances of ever living a normal life again, Kazuki could not watch his friend's expression.

Shaking his head, Kazuki dropped his hand to his side and sat on the bed. "So what are we going to eat?" he asked, looking at the bed.

Walking over, the blonde man threw a couple of things on the bed. Crackers, chips, water bottles, and two apples were not Kazuki's idea of a meal, but he did not argue. His stomach growled, not for the first time in weeks. He heard his friend chuckle as he joined him on the bed.

After drinking from his water bottle, Toshiki opened the bags of potato chips and offered him some. "You should grab as many as you want. Tomorrow we'll have better food," he promised him. He grabbed a handful and began eating them. "When did you know?"

Before Kazuki could answer, thunder interrupted him. "There are some things I'm not comfortable speaking about yet." Toshiki nodded, looking apologetic. After taking a bite from his apple, Kazuki looked at him. "Honestly, I think you asked the wrong question. You should have asked how it happened. It makes little difference, though. I do not know how, neither did Juubei. When the bump began to form… that's when I knew for sure."

"It's hard to believe," Toshiki admitted. "It's not as if a man getting pregnant is the usual news one hears. Does that mean you know as much as I do? That's not much."

Biting down on a salted cracker, Kazuki nodded. The salt made his tongue ache. Quickly he drank from his bottle. "If we're ever caught, we might learn more," he answered once he had finished drinking. "Perhaps it's for the best."

Toshiki blushed. "So, uh, do you know how you're going to…?" After making a waving gesture with his hand, Kazuki got the message. Just as he was going to voice it out, Toshiki blurted it. "How are you going to give birth to the baby?"

Looking at the bump, Kazuki shrugged. "I haven't thought that far ahead. If you have any suggestions, please let me know. It would be useful."

"Should we get you to a hospital?"

After closing his eyes, Kazuki bowed his head. "That's what Juubei wanted to do. On our way there, we realized it was a mistake. Whoever is after me wants this baby, no matter the cost. The baby is all that matters to them."

Narrowing his eyes, Toshiki threw him an understanding look. "You've thought about getting rid of the baby, haven't you?"

Kazuki inhaled a sharp breath. It took a moment before he could bring himself to answer the question. "Yes." A flash of lightning struck, bringing them darkness soon after.

TBC


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